Not Different, Just Better

Some time ago I made a post regarding the hole in the world of pop culture the release of the final part of Harry Potter would create. The culture-wide obsession is something that visits us every ten years or so, beginning with Lord of the Rings and including such franchises as the first three Star Wars films. Having realized it will be at least several years until a new option enters the fray, I have decided to shoulder the burden myself of selecting several potential candidates for you, the teeming masses. Look for more in upcoming posts in a move I tentatively title “staying motivated to post here at any cost.”

First up is “Cone-ing.” Like planking, but requiring the brain cells to keep a straight face and the coordination to use your hand like some kind of twisted bird-claw, cone-ing has the potential to be a fantastic new internet meme. What’s more, it requires real-life participation, therefore also making it a valuable campaign to prevent vitamin D deprivation among the youth of our generation. I understand it would be difficult to make a feature-length film featuring cone-ing exclusively. However, I believe that with the proper “star power” it is within the realm of possibility, as long as one downplays the lack of a plot, characters, or moral. It worked for the second three Star Wars films, after all. What’s more, a film opens up the way for a wide range of other media-“Cone-ing: The Junior Novelization.” “Cone-ing: Action Figure Playset.” “Cone-ing: Official Collector Statuette”

See, the last two would actually be the same thing but the second would cost twice as much.